This morning I received the coolest email from my editor—it was my book in a proofed PDF, page-laid-out form. It included the Library of Congress catalog page, dedication page, acknowledgement page…the whole shebang. In fact, Dave (my editor) told me they’re sending it to the printer next week. HOW EXCITING! So here is my final reflection of everything I learned, summed up in a nice little paragraph:
Question: What were the overall lessons I learned most from this process?
I learned that writing is difficult and it takes time, patience and a lot of self-forgiveness. Writing cannot be rushed. It cannot be taken lightly, but it also cannot be take too seriously—hence the self-forgiveness. The thing that stuck out to me most throughout this process was that the moment I started to be nice to myself without constantly beating myself up for not getting x-amount of pages or chapters done in x-amount of time, was also the same moment that the Lord freed my mind to write and clearly think through the edits. And from there the words, pages, chapters and edits started to pour out of me. I finished the totality of what it is to get a book ready for publication in such a short time, not because I was pressured into it because of the quick deadline, but because I had something to say and eventually figured out how to provide myself with the optimal environment for success.
I think that writing isn’t so much about what to say, it’s more so about setting yourself up with the best place and opportunity to say it. For me, writing was an organic expereince; one that became environmental at its core. I knew what I wanted to say and how I wanted to say it. I just needed to give myself the proper environment, room and time to be able to do so. And that environement, room and time ended up being formulated by me being nice to myself, forgiving myself, clearing myself from technological distractions and as a great friend of mine Dr. John Fuder says: “Andy, know that you’re writing for Jesus!” As soon as I truly and honestly believed that statement, I was good-to-go! And the rest is now officially, history.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
Monday, December 8, 2008
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Year End Reflection on my Weaknesses
As the end of 2008 continues to arrive quicker then I know what to do with, I wanted to reflect a little bit on what I’ve learned about myself. This past year has been a year of many firsts and big happenings:
-I got married
-I wrote and edited a book
-My Grandpa (who taught me what a humble, loving and hardworking man looks like) really digressed in his health—he now has full blown Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s and Dementia. Please pray for my Grandma as she takes care of him everyday, as well as for restoration and peace as his life winds down.
-My organization grew almost 40% from last year even in the midst of bad economic times
-For the first time I was speaking around the country for a good majority of the year
-My best friend moved from Chicago to San Francisco
-My wife and I are remodeling our condo
-I started a blog—something I said I’d never do! :)
-And I’m still in Grad School…these classes just keep dragging on and on. Ugh.
With all of those major events happening in one year it seems like my mind has been in a constant whirlwind. I’m not one who likes change. I don’t like limbo either. And yet that seems to be the exact place the Lord continues to put me in day after day, month after month. So I can either flow with Him or not. As my Dad says, “When the Spirit moves, just move with it!” And that’s what I’m trying to do with an open spirit that doesn’t paralyze me into fearing what is uncomfortable. It’s funny for me, because my ‘uncomfortable’ is not the unknown. It’s not people crying, sharing their lives or deepest darkest secrets. My uncomfortable is not entering into a constructive place of tension and staying there without being able to give an answer. My uncomfortable is rearranging my living space. It’s moving into a new office or condo. It’s buying a TV or some new furniture. I don’t know if this means that my priorities are dead on, or they’re way off. But I do know that I for sure know what makes me queasy.
There have been quite a few highlights this past year, and I hope many of them are just the start for what is to come. But if I only focus on the good stuff I’ll never grow. Therefore I’m going to publically self-assess my own weaknesses and start to work on them. None of us are without weaknesses; drat those weaknesses! So here are my two major weaknesses:
1. Self-doubt in the midst of trying to do great things for the Lord
2. Always trying to please everyone
The more I think about it the more I start to realize that my self-doubt comes out of my will to please everyone. No, I cannot please everyone. This understanding that I truly can’t please (when I say please I mean: help, assist, accommodate, agree, etc) everyone makes me think that I’m letting people down. Therefore, since I am not constantly able to do all of those things I doubt my ability to then be able to accomplish God’s ultimate goal for my life. I try as hard as I can, as Paul says, “to be all things to all people” so as to draw them closer to the Lord. But my mind wants that Pauline lesson to be so literal that it starts to overtake my rational reasoning of what actually can and cannot be done. I am learning the hard way that I am human—one man—who can only do so much. Regardless of my cognitive understanding of my own limitations, the doubt not-so-subtly creeps in. A friend of mine always tells me, “If the devil can’t get you to do the wrong thing, he gets you to do too much of the right thing causing the same result.”
And that is the balance that I’m trying to find right now as I move forward in my life’s work—both in my writing as a ministry and my organization. I have only really become aware of, or should I say, been able to put a label on my weaknesses just recently. Therefore I have been intentionally working on them by learning how to set boundaries, and also learning how to say no. Both of those things are extremely hard for me to do. But none the less are the two things in my life right now that will greatly hinder me in building a sustainable life’s work without quickly burning out. And any buring out is not what I’m here to do—or be.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
-I got married
-I wrote and edited a book
-My Grandpa (who taught me what a humble, loving and hardworking man looks like) really digressed in his health—he now has full blown Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s and Dementia. Please pray for my Grandma as she takes care of him everyday, as well as for restoration and peace as his life winds down.
-My organization grew almost 40% from last year even in the midst of bad economic times
-For the first time I was speaking around the country for a good majority of the year
-My best friend moved from Chicago to San Francisco
-My wife and I are remodeling our condo
-I started a blog—something I said I’d never do! :)
-And I’m still in Grad School…these classes just keep dragging on and on. Ugh.
With all of those major events happening in one year it seems like my mind has been in a constant whirlwind. I’m not one who likes change. I don’t like limbo either. And yet that seems to be the exact place the Lord continues to put me in day after day, month after month. So I can either flow with Him or not. As my Dad says, “When the Spirit moves, just move with it!” And that’s what I’m trying to do with an open spirit that doesn’t paralyze me into fearing what is uncomfortable. It’s funny for me, because my ‘uncomfortable’ is not the unknown. It’s not people crying, sharing their lives or deepest darkest secrets. My uncomfortable is not entering into a constructive place of tension and staying there without being able to give an answer. My uncomfortable is rearranging my living space. It’s moving into a new office or condo. It’s buying a TV or some new furniture. I don’t know if this means that my priorities are dead on, or they’re way off. But I do know that I for sure know what makes me queasy.
There have been quite a few highlights this past year, and I hope many of them are just the start for what is to come. But if I only focus on the good stuff I’ll never grow. Therefore I’m going to publically self-assess my own weaknesses and start to work on them. None of us are without weaknesses; drat those weaknesses! So here are my two major weaknesses:
1. Self-doubt in the midst of trying to do great things for the Lord
2. Always trying to please everyone
The more I think about it the more I start to realize that my self-doubt comes out of my will to please everyone. No, I cannot please everyone. This understanding that I truly can’t please (when I say please I mean: help, assist, accommodate, agree, etc) everyone makes me think that I’m letting people down. Therefore, since I am not constantly able to do all of those things I doubt my ability to then be able to accomplish God’s ultimate goal for my life. I try as hard as I can, as Paul says, “to be all things to all people” so as to draw them closer to the Lord. But my mind wants that Pauline lesson to be so literal that it starts to overtake my rational reasoning of what actually can and cannot be done. I am learning the hard way that I am human—one man—who can only do so much. Regardless of my cognitive understanding of my own limitations, the doubt not-so-subtly creeps in. A friend of mine always tells me, “If the devil can’t get you to do the wrong thing, he gets you to do too much of the right thing causing the same result.”
And that is the balance that I’m trying to find right now as I move forward in my life’s work—both in my writing as a ministry and my organization. I have only really become aware of, or should I say, been able to put a label on my weaknesses just recently. Therefore I have been intentionally working on them by learning how to set boundaries, and also learning how to say no. Both of those things are extremely hard for me to do. But none the less are the two things in my life right now that will greatly hinder me in building a sustainable life’s work without quickly burning out. And any buring out is not what I’m here to do—or be.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
A British take on Thanksgiving
The day before Thanksgiving I was graced with a phone call from a great friend of mine: Wendy Beech-Ward. Wendy works for Spring Harvest, she knows absolutely everyone and she’s British! Cool side story—her husband was the band manager for Boy George and the Culture Club. Just adds to her coolness doesn’t it…
Anyway, as we were talking about the future and some exciting possibilities between The Marin Foundation and the UK based Spring Harvest and Soul Survivor, she said something I never thought about before:
“Why do American’s celebrate the day that we [British] found the country?”
She said that jokingly, but either way it was an hilarious satirical comment coming from a Brit to an American guy who needs to be culturally pushed. I’ve never, ever thought about Thanksgiving from a British perspective before.
We hijacked their holiday! What's up with that? :)
Regardless, I’m thankful none the less.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Anyway, as we were talking about the future and some exciting possibilities between The Marin Foundation and the UK based Spring Harvest and Soul Survivor, she said something I never thought about before:
“Why do American’s celebrate the day that we [British] found the country?”
She said that jokingly, but either way it was an hilarious satirical comment coming from a Brit to an American guy who needs to be culturally pushed. I’ve never, ever thought about Thanksgiving from a British perspective before.
We hijacked their holiday! What's up with that? :)
Regardless, I’m thankful none the less.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Reflection of Writing a Book - Part 4
The editing process sucks. It was the worst thing I’ve had to do in a long, long time! Not only are all of your words, thoughts, experiences, insights and conclusions shredded by your editor, but then you have to somehow refocus on the broader task at hand and try to write it all again more succinctly to what makes clearer sense to the audience. My thought about that:
“I did write it clear to the audience the first time, you’re just not trying to understand what I’m saying.”
Wrong attitude. This just elongated my editing process, and it sure made it more painful.
I had no idea how to edit such a large piece of work. My editor’s suggestions were clear and I agreed with them for the most part, but I had the most difficult time trying to implement any of them because I knew in my head what he took out of the text. And for me in that moment, the only thing that made sense was the original full explanation of whatever I was talking about – not the diced up edited version. In my mind I couldn’t separate my original manuscript from the new edited version. It was too watered down; missing too much meat and substance. As I was going through the edits I kept thinking:
“But this would have made sense if you just kept it how I originally had it!”
Wrong attitude. This just elongated my editing process, and it sure made it more painful.
To seek help I called my editor, friends, family and other people I knew who have written books before. None of them seemed to be able to give me a piece of mind (not their fault, I just wasn’t able to receive any of their advice.) Then my ever intelligent uncle, Michael Dalton, spoke up in conjunction with a few others (mom, dad, wife), and they laid it down for me. They said that it’s my name that ultimately going to be on the book, and I better darn well be happy with every word no matter who says what about the content. “Start from scratch [from my original manuscript] and refine it how you see fit.”
It’s almost as if the huge gorilla sitting on my back jumped off and released me from the paralyzing burden of having to conform to “The Man’s Edits.” (sorry Dave ((he is my editor and he reads this)): it wasn’t you, it was me.) And from that point of realization I was free to take what Dave suggested and carve that into a new, sculpted, and way better version of my original manuscript.
Although I might have felt free, the book writing/editing process didn’t change from my original experience: it was still the most constricting project I’ve ever done. In two, 60-hour periods of time (that is 3 days a piece, or 6 days total, for those who don’t like math), I only slept 3 hours per 60 hours. The crazy part was that I wasn’t even tired! I was so engulfed and immersed, reliving each word and story as I did when I originally wrote them down, that time flew by. An hour seemed like a minute and a day seemed like an hour. But I busted my hump and worked hard; harder than I ever worked before. I thought writing a whole book in 7 weeks was rough … how about editing a whole book in 3? Ouch! And I have to deeply thank the folks who gave me their comments and feedback on the edits:
Peter Marin
Eric Leocadio
Dr. Becky Kuhn
Kristen Sifers
Tim Otto
Dr. Jim Coakley
Brian McLaren
and especially my main man Dave Zimmerman – it’s all good in the hood brotha!
It’s done. It’s totally and utterly done and I can’t wait for you all to read it. So here is my next lesson learned:
Editing sucks. It takes HUGE amounts of time and it needs to be treated with the same respect that was given to the writing process. I totally underestimated the severe levels of difficultly that editing brings.
Please don’t make the same mistake because your life will be terrible for significant periods of time. I hated my life because I hated the editing process. It was too daunting and too overwhelming to squeeze into short periods of time. But I learned and grew a ton; and totally and utterly confident and excited for every word that has become Love Is an Orientation. I do know this much though, I’ll never read another, or look at another book in the same fashion!
One more thought – none of what I said was to ever rip on InterVarsity Press. I love them. I love my editor. I can’t wait to do more with them. They are my family, for real! They made this whole process go as smooth as possible. My reflections are just the internal dialogue and battle I faced within myself throughout this journey. And I can’t wait to share that journey with you through the book.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
“I did write it clear to the audience the first time, you’re just not trying to understand what I’m saying.”
Wrong attitude. This just elongated my editing process, and it sure made it more painful.
I had no idea how to edit such a large piece of work. My editor’s suggestions were clear and I agreed with them for the most part, but I had the most difficult time trying to implement any of them because I knew in my head what he took out of the text. And for me in that moment, the only thing that made sense was the original full explanation of whatever I was talking about – not the diced up edited version. In my mind I couldn’t separate my original manuscript from the new edited version. It was too watered down; missing too much meat and substance. As I was going through the edits I kept thinking:
“But this would have made sense if you just kept it how I originally had it!”
Wrong attitude. This just elongated my editing process, and it sure made it more painful.
To seek help I called my editor, friends, family and other people I knew who have written books before. None of them seemed to be able to give me a piece of mind (not their fault, I just wasn’t able to receive any of their advice.) Then my ever intelligent uncle, Michael Dalton, spoke up in conjunction with a few others (mom, dad, wife), and they laid it down for me. They said that it’s my name that ultimately going to be on the book, and I better darn well be happy with every word no matter who says what about the content. “Start from scratch [from my original manuscript] and refine it how you see fit.”
It’s almost as if the huge gorilla sitting on my back jumped off and released me from the paralyzing burden of having to conform to “The Man’s Edits.” (sorry Dave ((he is my editor and he reads this)): it wasn’t you, it was me.) And from that point of realization I was free to take what Dave suggested and carve that into a new, sculpted, and way better version of my original manuscript.
Although I might have felt free, the book writing/editing process didn’t change from my original experience: it was still the most constricting project I’ve ever done. In two, 60-hour periods of time (that is 3 days a piece, or 6 days total, for those who don’t like math), I only slept 3 hours per 60 hours. The crazy part was that I wasn’t even tired! I was so engulfed and immersed, reliving each word and story as I did when I originally wrote them down, that time flew by. An hour seemed like a minute and a day seemed like an hour. But I busted my hump and worked hard; harder than I ever worked before. I thought writing a whole book in 7 weeks was rough … how about editing a whole book in 3? Ouch! And I have to deeply thank the folks who gave me their comments and feedback on the edits:
Peter Marin
Eric Leocadio
Dr. Becky Kuhn
Kristen Sifers
Tim Otto
Dr. Jim Coakley
Brian McLaren
and especially my main man Dave Zimmerman – it’s all good in the hood brotha!
It’s done. It’s totally and utterly done and I can’t wait for you all to read it. So here is my next lesson learned:
Editing sucks. It takes HUGE amounts of time and it needs to be treated with the same respect that was given to the writing process. I totally underestimated the severe levels of difficultly that editing brings.
Please don’t make the same mistake because your life will be terrible for significant periods of time. I hated my life because I hated the editing process. It was too daunting and too overwhelming to squeeze into short periods of time. But I learned and grew a ton; and totally and utterly confident and excited for every word that has become Love Is an Orientation. I do know this much though, I’ll never read another, or look at another book in the same fashion!
One more thought – none of what I said was to ever rip on InterVarsity Press. I love them. I love my editor. I can’t wait to do more with them. They are my family, for real! They made this whole process go as smooth as possible. My reflections are just the internal dialogue and battle I faced within myself throughout this journey. And I can’t wait to share that journey with you through the book.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
I Heart Haters (Or at least I try)
So I guess I couldn’t just go off quietly into the holidays now that I actually have some free time post-book editing. I’ll post about that in the upcoming days, but let me just tell you I went on a couple 60 hour stretches where I only got anywhere from 2-4 hours per sleep per 60 hour stretch … total! Ouch.
Anyway, something I want to talk about during this time of Thanksgiving is my ‘haters.’ I don’t understand haters. I don’t get them or why they’re so vicious. I don’t know why they think they have the right to say whatever they want, however malicious and/or false. In fact what I’ve learned is that about 99% of the people who talk trash about me have:
1. Never met me
2. Never heard me speak
3. Don’t care to try to do either #1 or #2
I had one such person at my last workshop in Nashville. He came in 40 minutes late, sat in the very last seat in the very last row in the furthest possible corner in the ballroom I was conducting my workshop in, and then he decided it would be a good idea to start yelling at me from the back of the ballroom. Who does that? Obviously this inconsiderate guy who didn’t care enough to show up on time, nor did he care enough to stay after for the 3 hour impromptu Q&A I had. In fact, we ended up getting kicked out of our ballroom because it went on to long … so we just found another room and kept it going! All of which that guy was no where to be found.
Shocker! (and I’m saying “shocker” in the absolute most sarcastic tone I possibly can!) Here’s the point: He didn’t want to stay around. He just wanted to yell. He didn’t want to dialogue. He didn’t want to listen, learn or understand anything but his nasty close-minded point of view on a topic that he probably doesn’t know a darn thing about. And I’m sure he got every ounce of satisfaction he was looking for. Good for him as he then, like a snake, slithered out of the back of the ballroom like the coward he entered, and the coward he left.
But that’s how haters operate.
And slowly but surely am I getting to realize that first hand. I take everything p
ersonally, I always have. But where the Lord is really working on me these days is to understand that those attacks are not against me, but rather against his work through me. Either way it’s still totally foreign to me. Though in this Thanksgiving time I must say that I am prayerfully trying with all I am to be thankful for my haters and for those who totally and utterly disagree and don’t understand (or want to understand) anything I’m about.
A good friend of mine and I were sitting in a restaurant in Miami in between workshops I was conducting when one such hater scenario played itself out in real time as we ate our sandwiches. Because of that situation he wrote a blog post on his feelings on the differences between a hater and a critic. It’s brilliant; and it’s something that I have truly been taking to heart. I hope you enjoy it as well. Thanks for your insight Dave!
So as I am thankful for many beautiful things this season – my new wife of just over 1 year, my family, friends, those in The Marin Foundation, and those all across the country who are reaching out to do significant things for the kingdom between the GLBT and religious communities. Just the same I also have to be thankful for my haters as the Lord literally loves them just as much as he loves me.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Anyway, something I want to talk about during this time of Thanksgiving is my ‘haters.’ I don’t understand haters. I don’t get them or why they’re so vicious. I don’t know why they think they have the right to say whatever they want, however malicious and/or false. In fact what I’ve learned is that about 99% of the people who talk trash about me have:
1. Never met me
2. Never heard me speak
3. Don’t care to try to do either #1 or #2
I had one such person at my last workshop in Nashville. He came in 40 minutes late, sat in the very last seat in the very last row in the furthest possible corner in the ballroom I was conducting my workshop in, and then he decided it would be a good idea to start yelling at me from the back of the ballroom. Who does that? Obviously this inconsiderate guy who didn’t care enough to show up on time, nor did he care enough to stay after for the 3 hour impromptu Q&A I had. In fact, we ended up getting kicked out of our ballroom because it went on to long … so we just found another room and kept it going! All of which that guy was no where to be found.
Shocker! (and I’m saying “shocker” in the absolute most sarcastic tone I possibly can!) Here’s the point: He didn’t want to stay around. He just wanted to yell. He didn’t want to dialogue. He didn’t want to listen, learn or understand anything but his nasty close-minded point of view on a topic that he probably doesn’t know a darn thing about. And I’m sure he got every ounce of satisfaction he was looking for. Good for him as he then, like a snake, slithered out of the back of the ballroom like the coward he entered, and the coward he left.
But that’s how haters operate.
And slowly but surely am I getting to realize that first hand. I take everything p
ersonally, I always have. But where the Lord is really working on me these days is to understand that those attacks are not against me, but rather against his work through me. Either way it’s still totally foreign to me. Though in this Thanksgiving time I must say that I am prayerfully trying with all I am to be thankful for my haters and for those who totally and utterly disagree and don’t understand (or want to understand) anything I’m about.A good friend of mine and I were sitting in a restaurant in Miami in between workshops I was conducting when one such hater scenario played itself out in real time as we ate our sandwiches. Because of that situation he wrote a blog post on his feelings on the differences between a hater and a critic. It’s brilliant; and it’s something that I have truly been taking to heart. I hope you enjoy it as well. Thanks for your insight Dave!
So as I am thankful for many beautiful things this season – my new wife of just over 1 year, my family, friends, those in The Marin Foundation, and those all across the country who are reaching out to do significant things for the kingdom between the GLBT and religious communities. Just the same I also have to be thankful for my haters as the Lord literally loves them just as much as he loves me.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
I'm Back
Hello everyone! It's official....
Love Is an Orientation is officially done, turned in and ready to go to print!
I'm back now, no longer 'off the grid.' Thanks for hanging in there with me over the last couple of weeks while I struggled to get everything done with total and full confidence in every word that I wrote - and all that I represent as a bridge builder for our heavenly father.
I want to wish everyone a happy and thanful Thanksgiving and I'll be posting on my recent adventures starting again on Monday.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Love Is an Orientation is officially done, turned in and ready to go to print!
I'm back now, no longer 'off the grid.' Thanks for hanging in there with me over the last couple of weeks while I struggled to get everything done with total and full confidence in every word that I wrote - and all that I represent as a bridge builder for our heavenly father.
I want to wish everyone a happy and thanful Thanksgiving and I'll be posting on my recent adventures starting again on Monday.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Youth Specialites Pitt
Before I go off the grid, I wanted to briefly talk about the last YS national convention held in Pittsburgh. I have to say that everything I said during Sacramento held true again! What a blessed and humbled weekend I had. But there was one glaring difference between the two cities:
As my friend Margaret Feinberg so elequently said to me before I took the general session stage - this region is more stoic in general, and therefore probably won't be as enthusiastic as what happened in Sacramento, especially around the topic of homosexuality.
Thank God she told me that! I was able to prepare my mindset before I went on, and indeed Margaret's words proved correct. It took me almost 10 minutes into my talk until the crowd started to loosen up a little bit and listen to what I had to say. As Marko, the President of YS put it,
"I noticed you threw a little more evangelical stuff in there tonight (vs. Sacramento) to relate to where the crowd was at."
What an observant guy ... that's why I love YS soooo much! They care enough to notice subtlties, and it makes all the difference in the world.
As for my talkback session and workshops, I once again stayed hours upon hours after each of them to answer every person's question. I love that more than anything else! My whole philosophy is that people pay good money to come to conferences, and I HAVE to make myself as accessable as I possibly can because what good is someone who talks and then darts off into their own little corner because they don't want to be bothered?!
Unfortunetly that is the norm, and I hate when speakers (especially the big timers) do such a thing. If it weren't for all of the people, those famous speakers wouldn't be famous ... so show respect! Anyway, I never want to be that type of person so I will always and forever make myself accessable because that is what the Lord has asked me to do!!! [For a point of clarification, I am NOT talking about any of the Friday speakers I had the privledge to be around. Margaret Feinberg and Soong-Chan Rah stayed, as I did, and answered every single person's question. They are legitimate people, and I truly love them to death! I hope that one day each of you will be able to hear their words and hearts for the Lord].
Enough of my little rant: The major thing that I noticed in the talkback and workshops in comparrison to Sacramento was that many of the people (inquisitive as they were), were coming from a completely different starting point. In as much as I could, I expected this because the topic of homosexuality isn't quite at the forefront of any headlines in Pittsburgh, Ohio, Kentucky, etc. from that region of the country. But the heart's of those in attendence were no less eager and yearning to see a bridge built to their gay and lesbian youth!!!!!
And to everyone who attended YS Pittsburgh, thanks for the questions and the heart to start this unique joureny together. I love you all so much!
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
As my friend Margaret Feinberg so elequently said to me before I took the general session stage - this region is more stoic in general, and therefore probably won't be as enthusiastic as what happened in Sacramento, especially around the topic of homosexuality.
Thank God she told me that! I was able to prepare my mindset before I went on, and indeed Margaret's words proved correct. It took me almost 10 minutes into my talk until the crowd started to loosen up a little bit and listen to what I had to say. As Marko, the President of YS put it,
"I noticed you threw a little more evangelical stuff in there tonight (vs. Sacramento) to relate to where the crowd was at."
What an observant guy ... that's why I love YS soooo much! They care enough to notice subtlties, and it makes all the difference in the world.As for my talkback session and workshops, I once again stayed hours upon hours after each of them to answer every person's question. I love that more than anything else! My whole philosophy is that people pay good money to come to conferences, and I HAVE to make myself as accessable as I possibly can because what good is someone who talks and then darts off into their own little corner because they don't want to be bothered?!
Unfortunetly that is the norm, and I hate when speakers (especially the big timers) do such a thing. If it weren't for all of the people, those famous speakers wouldn't be famous ... so show respect! Anyway, I never want to be that type of person so I will always and forever make myself accessable because that is what the Lord has asked me to do!!! [For a point of clarification, I am NOT talking about any of the Friday speakers I had the privledge to be around. Margaret Feinberg and Soong-Chan Rah stayed, as I did, and answered every single person's question. They are legitimate people, and I truly love them to death! I hope that one day each of you will be able to hear their words and hearts for the Lord].
Enough of my little rant: The major thing that I noticed in the talkback and workshops in comparrison to Sacramento was that many of the people (inquisitive as they were), were coming from a completely different starting point. In as much as I could, I expected this because the topic of homosexuality isn't quite at the forefront of any headlines in Pittsburgh, Ohio, Kentucky, etc. from that region of the country. But the heart's of those in attendence were no less eager and yearning to see a bridge built to their gay and lesbian youth!!!!!
And to everyone who attended YS Pittsburgh, thanks for the questions and the heart to start this unique joureny together. I love you all so much!
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Off the Grid
Hello!
So if you're in Southern California come on out - it's open to the public. Here's a description:
November 15th, 2008 9am - 2pm
Evergreen Baptist Church
CostPre-Registration $15 (Deadline - November 11th) On Site Registration $20 (includes all training and lunch)
Register online or by calling 800-734-8994
I'm going off the grid for a few days (maybe a week). Next week my final edits for Love is an Orientation: Elevating the Conversation with the Gay Community, are due!
And when I say final edits I mean:
-This is it for real
-No more changes once I turn it in this one last time
-Final, final, final version of everything
-No more take-backs
-What I turn in is what you'll be reading when you buy it
And while I might be gone, I am going to be speaking at Park City Baptist Church in Dallas and then off to Los Angeles for the next of The Coalition's bridge building events in Southern California. Here is the promo flyer:
So if you're in Southern California come on out - it's open to the public. Here's a description:
“Building Bridges Between the GLBT Community and the Faith Community”
What happens when Bible-believing Christians get together with gays and lesbians … or gay Christians? Can something peaceful and productive happen for the Kingdom or does this relationship always have to centralize itself around the same old fights, arguments and debates? This large-group, day long training will intentionally bring these topics to the forefront as we discover what it means to learn, listen and understand our way through the culture war of GLBT-Christian relations. While being able to recognize a difference in theology, Elevating the Conversation will teach you the theory, practice and application on how to effectively build a bridge between the gay and lesbian and Christian communities in order to make a significant in Southern California from this day forward.
November 15th, 2008 9am - 2pm
Evergreen Baptist Church
1255 San Gabriel Blvd
Rosemead, CA 91770
CostPre-Registration $15 (Deadline - November 11th) On Site Registration $20 (includes all training and lunch)
Register online or by calling 800-734-8994
See you all soon.
Much love.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Election Day
I voted this morning.
It’ll be an interesting night not only for our nation, but also here in Chicago (Barack Obama’s setting up camp in Grant Park about a mile away from where I live – they are expecting about 650,000 people in attendance tonight).
More importantly, it’ll be an interesting next 4 years – whoever wins.
And regardless of whoever wins the election I know that the Body will need to rise up, together, and live faithfully.
Focusing on the Father and not the Flag.
The Lord has entrusted us with the responsibility to be a flesh representation of Him here on earth while our time lasts, and thus, our charge has clearly been defined as Followers of the Way – not the President – well before or well after November 4th, 2008.
Be Bold.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
It’ll be an interesting night not only for our nation, but also here in Chicago (Barack Obama’s setting up camp in Grant Park about a mile away from where I live – they are expecting about 650,000 people in attendance tonight).
More importantly, it’ll be an interesting next 4 years – whoever wins.
And regardless of whoever wins the election I know that the Body will need to rise up, together, and live faithfully.
Focusing on the Father and not the Flag.
The Lord has entrusted us with the responsibility to be a flesh representation of Him here on earth while our time lasts, and thus, our charge has clearly been defined as Followers of the Way – not the President – well before or well after November 4th, 2008.
Be Bold.
Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Gay Marriage
With the election coming up, and the vote in California for Prop 8 - otherwise known as the gay marriage bill - I have been receiving a lot of emails wondering my take on the whole issue. My bridge building goal is to elevate the conversation between the GLBT community and the Church, and so here it is:
Recently I was being interviewed on a national radio show and the host retold a story about speaking at a political rally outside of a courthouse. The rally was geared toward the fight to protect the institution of traditional biblical marriage. As he was walking toward the park where the rally was being held he noticed a not so subtle pack of GLBT protesters roped off across the street screaming at anyone seemed to be going in the rally’s general direction. The protesters held up cleaver signs in support of gay marriage and called the passer-bys names; dubbing them “religious right bigots.” The host went on to talk about “the gay agenda” in broad, non-specific generalizations; an “evil agenda” that has such a strong controlling influence that it poisons the minds of the GLBT community. His conclusion was that “rank and file” gays and lesbians blindly perpetuate political and religious upheaval around the country. “They [gays and lesbians] don’t even know what they’re doing. They just do it because every other gay and lesbian is doing it.”
I don’t know if I heard him right or not, but it sure sounded like he was blaming an agenda for brainwashing individual people’s actions. And I swear that is the exact same accusation the gay agenda folks blame the religious right for doing to Christians. During this particular interview and the next six interviews I gave, each host told me that the gay agenda was the single driving force of hatred towards evangelical Christians.
I’ve caught on to the pattern and this whole thing is ridiculous. All this talk of agendas is now officially wasting everybody’s time.
One of the main fighting points is over the legalization of gay marriage. Christian parents all over the country are already forced to have difficult conversations with their children about why their kid’s friends have two moms or two dads—regardless if the two moms or two dads are legally married or not.
In research done by The Williams Institute and the Urban Institute, more than 65,000 adopted children are living with gay or lesbian parents in the United States. The same research also showed that over 14,000 foster children (3% of all foster children) are living with gay or lesbian foster parents.
Preventing legalized same sex marriage, or legalizing it, is not going to change the conversation for any Christian family.
As Shane Claiborne and Chris Haw acknowledge in their book Jesus for President, we find ourselves in a fallen world that dominates government and culture in ways that are not of our Father. It is not the Christian community’s responsibility to govern a world that we do not belong to; fight in wars that are in direct opposition to Jesus’ peaceful, non-violent approach; or reign over a government we are not a part of.
"For Jesus and his followers, the central question was, How do we live faithfully to God? It [the central question] was not How do we run the world as Christians … how do I run this profit-driven corporation as a Christian … how can we make culture more Christian … how would a responsible Christian run this war. But Jesus taught that his followers—or even the Son of God!—should not attempt to “run the world” (p. 167).
Let the politically active have what the politically active think belongs to them. Christians should think in God’s terms, not in human terms.
"Caesar could brand with his image coins, crowns, and robes, which moths would eat and rust would destroy. But life and creation have God’s stamp on them. Caesar could have his coins, but life is God’s. Caesar had no right to take what is God’s. We are also reminded that just as Caesar stamped his image on coins, God’s image is stamped on human beings." (p. 117)
The political world means too much to Christianity, and people mean too little. Love is a tangible and measurable expression of one’s unconditional behaviors towards another; it’s not a legalized rule written into governmental documents.
And whether or not gay marriage is politically accepted or denied, it still should not change how we as Christians live in relation to and relationship with, anyone who is gay or lesbian.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
Recently I was being interviewed on a national radio show and the host retold a story about speaking at a political rally outside of a courthouse. The rally was geared toward the fight to protect the institution of traditional biblical marriage. As he was walking toward the park where the rally was being held he noticed a not so subtle pack of GLBT protesters roped off across the street screaming at anyone seemed to be going in the rally’s general direction. The protesters held up cleaver signs in support of gay marriage and called the passer-bys names; dubbing them “religious right bigots.” The host went on to talk about “the gay agenda” in broad, non-specific generalizations; an “evil agenda” that has such a strong controlling influence that it poisons the minds of the GLBT community. His conclusion was that “rank and file” gays and lesbians blindly perpetuate political and religious upheaval around the country. “They [gays and lesbians] don’t even know what they’re doing. They just do it because every other gay and lesbian is doing it.”
I don’t know if I heard him right or not, but it sure sounded like he was blaming an agenda for brainwashing individual people’s actions. And I swear that is the exact same accusation the gay agenda folks blame the religious right for doing to Christians. During this particular interview and the next six interviews I gave, each host told me that the gay agenda was the single driving force of hatred towards evangelical Christians.
I’ve caught on to the pattern and this whole thing is ridiculous. All this talk of agendas is now officially wasting everybody’s time.
One of the main fighting points is over the legalization of gay marriage. Christian parents all over the country are already forced to have difficult conversations with their children about why their kid’s friends have two moms or two dads—regardless if the two moms or two dads are legally married or not.
In research done by The Williams Institute and the Urban Institute, more than 65,000 adopted children are living with gay or lesbian parents in the United States. The same research also showed that over 14,000 foster children (3% of all foster children) are living with gay or lesbian foster parents.
Preventing legalized same sex marriage, or legalizing it, is not going to change the conversation for any Christian family.
As Shane Claiborne and Chris Haw acknowledge in their book Jesus for President, we find ourselves in a fallen world that dominates government and culture in ways that are not of our Father. It is not the Christian community’s responsibility to govern a world that we do not belong to; fight in wars that are in direct opposition to Jesus’ peaceful, non-violent approach; or reign over a government we are not a part of.
"For Jesus and his followers, the central question was, How do we live faithfully to God? It [the central question] was not How do we run the world as Christians … how do I run this profit-driven corporation as a Christian … how can we make culture more Christian … how would a responsible Christian run this war. But Jesus taught that his followers—or even the Son of God!—should not attempt to “run the world” (p. 167).
Let the politically active have what the politically active think belongs to them. Christians should think in God’s terms, not in human terms.
"Caesar could brand with his image coins, crowns, and robes, which moths would eat and rust would destroy. But life and creation have God’s stamp on them. Caesar could have his coins, but life is God’s. Caesar had no right to take what is God’s. We are also reminded that just as Caesar stamped his image on coins, God’s image is stamped on human beings." (p. 117)
The political world means too much to Christianity, and people mean too little. Love is a tangible and measurable expression of one’s unconditional behaviors towards another; it’s not a legalized rule written into governmental documents.
And whether or not gay marriage is politically accepted or denied, it still should not change how we as Christians live in relation to and relationship with, anyone who is gay or lesbian.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Prayer for the Faithful
Thank you Lord for this opportunity to Be;
For this opportunity to be Yours.
Our prayers, wants, hopes and desires –
We pray them knowing what we pray and the end result we yearn to see,
but can never know or understand the Kingdom ramifications of how You are going to get those simple, yet passionate and heartfelt eternal prayers accomplished.
Because what is in our head never seems to play itself out how we ourselves think it so.
Our direct points from A to B, might end up A to B looped through C to Z, backtracked to M and on to O; followed by P and back to E ending in where our original B prayer landed us.
And you do it because you respect us,
and deem our prayer worthy to the best that only You know how to accomplish it –
fully; and thoroughly lived out as only You can grant Your follower their Kingdom passions.
Therefore Father:
Let us be who you need us to be.
Let us do what you need us to do.
Let us go where you need us to go.
Let us work how you need us to work.
Let us live how you need us to live.
Let us speak how you need us to speak.
Let us feel what you need us to feel.
Let us follow how you need us to follow.
Let us lead how you need us to lead.
Let us learn what you need us to learn.
Whatever those words mean to you, and whatever that will look like for me and my life –
take me; take us.
Take all of us – however You see it to the optimal expression of our Spirit’s prayers.
And take all of us to truly, tangibly and as real as we possibly can:
Live out Your will on earth as it is in Heaven.
Thank you and Praise you Holy Father.
In Jesus precious name;
Amen.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
For this opportunity to be Yours.
Our prayers, wants, hopes and desires –
We pray them knowing what we pray and the end result we yearn to see,
but can never know or understand the Kingdom ramifications of how You are going to get those simple, yet passionate and heartfelt eternal prayers accomplished.
Because what is in our head never seems to play itself out how we ourselves think it so.
Our direct points from A to B, might end up A to B looped through C to Z, backtracked to M and on to O; followed by P and back to E ending in where our original B prayer landed us.
And you do it because you respect us,
and deem our prayer worthy to the best that only You know how to accomplish it –
fully; and thoroughly lived out as only You can grant Your follower their Kingdom passions.
Therefore Father:
Let us be who you need us to be.
Let us do what you need us to do.
Let us go where you need us to go.
Let us work how you need us to work.
Let us live how you need us to live.
Let us speak how you need us to speak.
Let us feel what you need us to feel.
Let us follow how you need us to follow.
Let us lead how you need us to lead.
Let us learn what you need us to learn.
Whatever those words mean to you, and whatever that will look like for me and my life –
take me; take us.
Take all of us – however You see it to the optimal expression of our Spirit’s prayers.
And take all of us to truly, tangibly and as real as we possibly can:
Live out Your will on earth as it is in Heaven.
Thank you and Praise you Holy Father.
In Jesus precious name;
Amen.
Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org
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