I'm Moving - New Blog Ready!

Hello!

Here is some exciting news, I've got a new blog location:

www.loveisanorientation.com

I will no longer be posting at this location, so head on over to www.loveisanorientation.com and join in on the conversation! For those of you who subscribe to this blog, there is a new subscription button on the new site.

Blogger did me well, and now I'm over to this new site thanks to Adam McLane!!!!!!! He did the WHOLE THING!

See you at www.loveisanorientation.com!

Much love.
Andrew

Other Faith's Love Love

I have been touched recently by the amount of non-evangelical, even non-Christian people that have read Love is an Orientation and thought it worthwhile enough to personally write me. I have received numerous emails telling me of touching stories and examples of how my book has made a direct impact on people’s sphere’s of influence; shaking their traditional paradigms of engagement and actually doing something to intentionally start building bridges. I have been printing these emails and hanging them on my wall in my office to give me a constant reminder of why I am pounding my head against a brick wall of oppression day after day. But as one of my friends clarified,

“Andrew, if you keep hitting your head against a brick wall, one day the wall will break!”

So hit away I will…

There were two public reviews I have recently seen that really caught my attention because one is from a Muslim and the other is from a gay Anabaptist.

Here is the review of my book from a Muslim, Afdhere Jama, who is the author of the book Illegal Citizens: Queer Lives in the Muslim World. He also edits Huriyah, a bilingual (arabic in paper, english online) GLBT Muslim magazine.

Wow. Humbled. Overwhelmed. That's all I can say about that.

And this link is from the Young Anabaptist Radicals blog (I made a comment on this post). Again, I am in total amazement how the Lord is using the book to cross cultural and religious boundaries!

If you’ve seen any cool reviews, hit me up because I’d love to read them as well.

Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org

[Addendum on June 16, 2009: Do you ever find yourself being labled into a socially constructed group because someone on the outside doesn't understand you? I tackle this question in my own life after the last two conservative evangelical radio interviews have called me Emergent for no other reason than I live within, and loves me some GLBT folks.]

Am I Emergent? I tackle this question in 4 minutes and 33 seconds after I have been called Emergent by two of the last three conservative evangelical radio hosts I have been on with. This clip is not me speaking against Emergent, but rather about the indictment of evangelicalism surrounding homosexuality and the life I live.

What are your thoughts on Emergent? Conservativism? None of the above? Love to hear you thoughts on this whole thing.

Much love.

http://www.themarinfoundation.org/

Andrew Marin talking to TV Host Kelly Morgan

This video was taken minutes ago in the green room of Harvest TV's studios after taping 2 segments for their program. The host I am talking to is Kelly Morgan - I love her to death. She gets it, asked wonderful questions during the interviews and her family lives in the tension everyday as her two kids (one in majoring in it in college and one younger in middle school) are both involved in theater and production. Her heart was honest and I really appriciated her stepping out to have me on their program.

And PS - is there anything that motivates weight loss more than looking at how many chins you have?! Wow.

Seriously though, tell me what you want to see and hear through these videos so I can keep it fresh and relevant!

Much love.

http://www.themarinfoundation.org/

I'm Speaking at a Gay Bar Tonight

Tonight will be quite a night for us all. I’ll be speaking at a gathering called Elements, and they are hosting it at Roscoes—a well known gay bar in Chicago. Elements is an evangelical Christian organization who seeks to live life differently, in the places regular evangelical folks don’t tend to ever go. They bring in one controversial speaker a month, and hold the event in a controversial place that aligns with the speaker’s topic. So here we’ll be tonight at a gay bar, mixing up straight evangelicals with Roscoes normal GLBT patrons (and we can’t forget all of the folks from the different shades of faith and sexuality from The Marin Foundation who will be in attendance as well).

It will be a very exciting time and I pray the Lord uses this as a launching pad for other great connections to make significant bridges for the Kingdom. If you’re in Chicago, please feel free to come and by and experience an unforgettable night of productive dialogue!

Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org

Day of Silence

Today is the National Day of Silence, where GLBT youth and their allies vow to not talk today at school to bring awareness to the name-calling, bullying and harassment of them in schools. In response to this day there are many Christians out there who decide to pull their kids out of school in protest.

I think that is the biggest mistake a Christian parent could possibly make.

Why?

1. It breeds in our Christian youth the idea that if we don’t agree with something we protest and walk in the other direction. And in my opinion, there is no worse way to represent our Christian faith on such a day.

2. From my perspective, what a better way to bring the GLBT topic to the forefront in our Christian homes then to use this day as a springboard in how to peacefully and productively engage what has always been nothing more than a very divisive topic. And in doing such a thing with middle and high schoolers, it gives us a wonderful opportunity to start our youth down the right path in how to bridge within the GLBT community. It's our chance to do something different in showing our faith rather than just talking about it in regards to homosexuality, which is what most of us tend to do.

I was on a Christian radio program recently and off the air the host told me about how his daughter wanted to go to school that day because she knew all of her other Christian friends were going to protest and not be in school. The host went on to tell me that she was the only Christian kid left in many of her classes, and at the end of the day everyone in one of her classes was being silent. Since she was the only one not being silent, and since she was the only Christian, for 20 minutes the teacher allowed her to talk about her faith and her love, and all of the reasons why she decided to come to school that day in opposition to all of the other Christian who didn’t!

Just think what would happen around the country if our Christian kids did as she did…

I could only imagine.

A colleague of mine, Dr. Warren Throckmorton, has started what he calls the Golden Rule Pledge to be done on the Day of Silence. Take a look, and next year feel free to join in—keeping our kids in school and using this day as the Kingdom opportunity it should be.

What do you think...right or wrong?

Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/

Follow-Up to Scot McKnight’s Post—Part 2

Here is my quick summary to understand what I was talking about in the last post regarding validation and affirmation (as I spend all of Chapter 5 in my book deconstructing validation. The chapter is called: Who are We Looking to for Validation: The GLBT Quest for Good News from God).

The first thing we all must understand is that there is a difference between validation and affirmation, as they are two completely independent constructs. Yet surrounding the topic of homosexuality, many in the Church take the stance that if I am to validate a GLBT person’s life and experiences as legitimate to them—their life—their story, that automatically means that I am leaping to affirming a pro-gay theological belief system. And that conclusion is just not right (or appropriate)! How am I to live within Christ’s come-as-you-are-culture if I’m not willing to even put in the time or effort to meet people exactly where they are without invalidating their entire known existence? It is imperative to be engaged with exactly what the GLBT community understands as truth, especially if it does not fully align with your understanding of truth. I believe that you can never see into someone’s heart and soul as much as we all think we can.

The finger pointing and the negative assumptions happen all of the time to both the straight Christian and the GLBT person—and it’s no wonder why GLBT people for the most part want nothing to do with us or our churches. Christians have to stretch themselves as they realize that validation to a gay or lesbian’s experience as it has pertained to their life is indeed as real and valid to them as any of your experiences. My belief is that discrediting those things are the same as losing faith in the understanding that God is in control of any situation or life—no matter where they are coming from. That might be a harsh analogy, but the severity of this invalidation pandemic is plaguing this culture war and perpetuating the very real disconnect that exists in being able to productively build a bridge from both communities. Many GLBT people are not willing to even entertain the idea of Christ from an evangelical perspective because they are too (I would even say rightly so) caught up in the fear of having their lives and experiences quashed by Christians who won’t think twice about it.

Just because someone’s life and experiences are validated does not mean that automatically affirms what others might not believe. I am not asking or expecting either community to believe in something they don’t believe in. But the conversation has always attempted to just force both sides into affirming one belief over the other (which will never systemically happen) rather than start with the base level understanding of validation—which provides space for all of us to start willfully living in this place of constructive tension. Change the conversation to humanly validation as relevant to legitimate life experiences, and all of a sudden you have changed the course of a potential relationship/significant place of growth socially and in Christ as well.

We must start to own a mindset that passes beyond the knee-jerk actions that traditionally cause reactionary offensive attacks towards each other. We have to work on the hang-ups when hearing a variety of traditionally hostile and divisive constructs, in order to fulfill our goal of being a productive bridge builder for the Kingdom.

Once that happens, we are all indeed starting from a level playing field.

Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/

Follow-Up to Scot McKnight’s Post—Part 1

Last week I alerted everyone to two posts Scot McKnight did about a letter he received from a Christian worship leader who asking for advice about a student in their group who is gay and believes God blesses same-sex civil unions. He posted the letter one day, and then the next day he posted a response he asked me to write.

Over the course of a few days there were 142 comments going back and forth about things that didn’t even relate to the letter or to my response—such is the life of the majority of posts/comments about the topic of homosexuality (the reason why I LOVE you all so much because you get it, and don’t get into those traditional and stale debates that prove very unproductive). Anyway, Scot was so taken back by the comments that he went back and posted another blog on what it means to have civility in two contexts: the bottom line in civility and civility in the intent in our convictions.

I thought Scot was 100% dead on with his deconstruction of civility at its core and its application, and it’s worth a read. Then something strange happened, within the next day or so there were 142 comments just on that post—and a majority of them weren’t civil at all! I think what happens is when people see the word homosexuality connected with anything, they think it gives them right to not contemplate anything that was said, but rather gives them free reign to resort back to their baseline arguments; wherever those arguments are coming from. That’s crazy! And that is exactly what task the Lord has given me—to systemically help us learn to not do such a thing.

In my observations of all of the 284 comments between the three posts (some of which were my comments as well), I feel the biggest disconnected gap between Scot and my words vs. the majority of the comments were that people are having a very difficult time separating the difference between validation and affirmation; an important part of understanding how to peacefully and productively build a bridge and one that I'll talk about in my next post.

Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/

This Weekend's United Church of Christ Event

This weekend I will be speaking to a group of United Church of Christ (UCC) clergy members in the St. Louis area. As many of you know, the UCC is one of the denominations that are being torn apart by the topic of homosexuality. Although much of the UCC has already decided upon an affirming stance (a pro-gay theological belief system) that includes ordination of gay and lesbian people, there are still factions that believe in a traditional interpretation of Scripture.

The fight within the UCC has become public news, especially in the Midwest region. I was therefore asked to come and speak to a gathering of UCC clergy, both progressive and conservative, together, to help facilitate a peaceful and productive dialogue to help stop the fighting. If you think of me over the weekend, please pray for my time with those in the UCC who will be in attendance, as the Holy Spirit will move throughout our time and let there be significant changes within each side’s understanding and will to build bridges towards each other and for the Kingdom.

If we can’t work with our own, how can we expect those on the outside to believe in what we claim?

Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org

Ted Haggard's Documentary

A Facebook friend of mine, Darin Brown, sent me this link to an article by ABC News about Ted Haggard’s entrance back into the public eye after his scandal of down-low drugs and gay sex behind his family’s, congregation’s and all the rest of the evangelical world listening to his direction as President of the National Association of Evangelical’s back. Wow, that’s a mouthful. Darin wanted to know my take, so here you go…

It’s a well written article about the sad and pitiful life that has become Ted Haggard, Mike Jones (the man who ‘outed’ Haggard) and the surrounding cast of characters that have been caught woven this web (mainly his family). In the beginning of the article Haggard “blames his father” for everything that has happened to him in the past couple of years—his father started sexually molesting him at 7 years old. These are confusing times in a confusing life in a confusing world, and in reading that revelation it’s hard for me to critique Haggard’s life and experiences because they are a legitimate expression of what has happened to him in his past.

We all have to remember that no child—no person—should ever be molested, raped or be sexually, physically or mentally abused! Therefore I have no judgment for what such a situation psychologically does to a human’s psyche, and how that affects them moving forward. I’m just going to go off of what I know about him—you can read the article and make those other conclusions for yourself.

But I do know this much—sexual abuse does not mean someone will be gay or lesbian. I spent a section in my book about this topic because I feel it’s an easy way for the Christian community to copout against entering into a place of tension with the GLBT community without knowing the answers to the “why questions” for God. Sexual abuse is not normal—gay or straight. Research shows that there is an average of about 5-7% of the GLBT community who admitted to have been sexually abused as a child. Now, Ted Haggard could definitely have had his same-sex attractions come as a result of his father’s abuse, but far be it for any of us—or him—to so easily state that as fact. I question Haggard’s statement because three weeks after the scandal hit the press he made a public statement saying he is “completely heterosexual.” If it were that easy for him, why didn’t he do it earlier by stopping the paid-gay sex before it tarnished him and embarrassed his wife and kids? And if it were that easy for him, why in this ABC News article does he say that he “continues to struggle with same-sex attraction”?

Saying after three weeks that he is “completely heterosexual” is a spit in the face to all the true, honest and committed people in this world who faithfully work to overcome their same-sex attractions. Just the same, that statement is just a much of a spit in the face to all of the true, honest and committed people in this world who have faithfully tried “reorientation therapy”, but are now faithful and committed gay Christians.

And if all along Ted Haggard had a same-sex attraction, don’t you dare stand up at the pulpit of a 12,000 person church and as the President of a 30 million person strong National Association of Evangelicals and say on the record:

"We don't have to debate about what we should think about homosexual activity. It's written in the Bible." Then Haggard looks into the camera and says kiddingly: "I think I know what you did last night," drawing laughs from the crowd. "If you send me a thousand dollars, I won't tell your wife." Later, another joke for the cameraman: "If you use any of this, I'll sue you."

None of that is funny Mr. Haggard, especially since at that exact time you were cheating on your wife with a male prostitute and taking crystal-meth.

HBO will be airing a documentary of Haggard on January 29, and coincidentally enough, the director of the documentary is none other than the daughter (Alexandra Pelosi) of the Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi. That is a strange clash of worlds in-and-of-itself because it is the same Nancy Pelosi who’s constituency is in San Francisco—and there are a number of conservative Christian organizations (the same Christian organizations who Haggard once represented) that constantly bash Nancy Pelosi for her continuing endorsement of the San Francisco Folsom Street Fair. I find it very strange that Haggard would pick the daughter of the person who endorses what Haggard’s target audience thinks is a depraved abomination.

This makes me wonder a few things:

-Does he think he’ll get more of a fair shake on screen about his past if it comes from a very liberal director whose mom is political public allies with the GLBT community?

-And whether that is true or not, the surrounding evidence still leads me to question Haggard’s motives for making this documentary—just to get back into the public eye or is he really making a true plea for redemption?

My thought is that if he were really making a true plea for redemption to the broader Christian community, he would do so with his target audience (conservative Christians) in mind—and there are no lack of conservative Christian documentary directors.

I don’t claim to know Ted Haggard. Maybe one day I’ll have the stomach to watch his documentary—not on January 29th though. I know too many spouses and children who are indelibly affected by parents who are “found out” after the fact—and it makes me sick to think of the people who willfully caused that pain.

And the one thing I keep thinking—his poor wife and kids—how embarrassing and tragic for them. And they couldn’t do a darn thing about it.

I hope the best for Ted Haggard and his family. I also hope that he would just tone down the public rhetoric of his now all-of-a-sudden “having a message of redemption for a lot of people struggling with sexual issues” and peacefully and quietly seek God with all he has from a far distance away from any TV or documentary cameras.

Much love.
www.themarinfoundation.org

The Pope's Comments about Homosexuality (revised)

The BBC News reported today that, in his year-end speech to the senior Vatican staff, the Pope stated that gender theory blurs the distinction between male and female and could thus lead to the self-destruction of the human race (click here and here for two versions of the story.)

Throughout his speech the Pope threw out various (and classical) intellectual jargon surrounding the topic of homosexuality—“language of creation”, “metaphysics speaking of the nature of the human person” and “gender theory.” All in all he ultimately stated how same-sex behaviors go against the Creator’s intent. I understand the Pope is an intelligent man; otherwise he wouldn’t have been voted to lead the hundreds of millions of people who are a part of the Catholic faith all over the world. Yet his language regarding homosexuality seems to be stuck in a place from decades ago. It seems as though the Pope has not given any thought to, or struggled with, a further understanding of what it means (and how it looks) to draw gay and lesbian people to Christ—through a faith that encompasses a true come-as-you-are culture.

His, and many other Christian’s (Catholic or otherwise) mindset is for the GLBT community to be fixed when they enter the door…or fixed before they enter the door…or fixed on the Christian’s timetable…or conditionally accepted as a child of God only when certain things occur. There is a clear distinction between validation and affirmation, and yet many Christians (seemingly what includes the Pope as well in this scenario) do not see these two constructs as independent of the other.

No no no my friends. Although the Pope was attempting to make the point that sexuality is a creation issue and not a political or philosophical issue, his tact, again, is not up to par coming from a man who is suppose to set the forerunning tone as an example for all other Catholics—and Christians in general.

As a great friend brought up, the Apostle Paul reminds us that the Kingdom of God is not a matter of talk but of power. And with that in mind, what is the Pope doing other than talking—and ticking off A LOT of GLBT people around the world? What is he winning for Christ with gays and lesbians by just talking? What is the Pope doing to build a peaceful and productive bridge by tangibly reaching out to gays and lesbians to show them what and who Christ is—not just standing from a podium telling folks what Christ wants them to do. And if this is the example the Catholic leader sends, how can he (or we, or the gay community) expect any Christian to do otherwise? We (and the gay community) can’t.

Although I do not have a same-sex attraction, I have looked at myself as a part of the GLBT community for the past 9 years as I have been unconditionally loved and welcomed with open arms to live life with all of the people who do—regardless of my, or their, difference in theology with one another. Even I am offended by the Pope’s heavily tread argument. I actually don’t know if I can call it an “argument.” How about this: instead I’ll say that, “even I am offended by his classic use of overly debated, traditional language and theories surrounding GLBT and religious issues that have already proven themselves to not build a bridge, nor draw gays and lesbians closer to God.” It’s as if both sides are still convinced that eventually they’ll systemically convince the other that their belief is right. How long must this false ideal persist?

I believe the Bible is the inerrant word of God. I know many gays and lesbians and people with a same-sex attraction that believe the same. I also know many on both sides who don’t think that’s a valid statement as interpretational issues have tainted the original intent of Scripture. Yet there is a way to make room for uncomfortable conversations and places in which people have differing theological belief systems—and yet something significant can still happen for the Kingdom—together. We all don’t have to agree on every doctrinal issue, but the least any of us can do is to willfully reach across the divide and welcome another into knowing what it means to really know Jesus. Does the Pope believe that? Does the Pope want to reach across the divide and listen, learn, not judge, not condemn but rather measurably love the GLBT community without knowing the end result? I don’t know. From his words and his lack of actions I am leaning towards an answer of “no.” But maybe I’ll be proven wrong? I hope I’ll be proven wrong! As I always say, we all have until our last breathe to accomplish what the Lord has set out for our lives—and that includes the Pope as well. :)

I’m not asking the Pope to change his beliefs to something he'll never believe in, I’m just asking him to consider what it means to productively, peacefully, boldly and intentionally build a bridge to the GLBT community.

The wholistic message of the Bible is how believers are to live in relation to, and relationship with the world and all that make it up—not to save humanity from anything except by tangibly ushering humanity to the Eternal King and Judge to let Him do as He said He would—bring love and redemption to those that seek Him out. As a Christian community, I plead that each of you reading this would go out of your way today (especially in this Christmas season) to call, email or talk to someone you know in the GLBT community and tell them, as a believer in Christ, that you love them with all that you are and long to see them know Jesus—no strings or conditions attached.


Much love.
http://www.themarinfoundation.org/